Share An Answer: How To Manage Aggressiveness
posted in Relationship, Share An Answer, Fear, Handling Aggressiveness, Handling Abuse, Calm |Hi Folks,
Since we started the series “9 Secret Steps To Life Transformation“, from time to time we will receive emails asking Karen or Myself questions pertaining to certain situations or asking for clarification on certain points we mentioned in our post.
We love all these emails and we response to each and everyone of them, sharing with them how we would handle the situation ourselves if we were in their shoes based on our own experience and our understanding of the Law of Attraction.
Then Karen suddenly said “Why not we share some of the questions and answers with our reader on our blog? The question is certainly relevant and our answers may benefit a lot of folks out there but we need to masked the name of the reader who is asking the question.”
“What an excellent idea!” I thought and here it is, our first “Share An Answer” Post. The question was asked after our reader read this post - “9 Secret Steps To Life Transformation: Karen Lim’s Abundance At Work” and here’s the question (published with readers permission):
“Hi Karen,
Was reading your recent blog about asking for help with project management and have some questions.
What do you do when you get negative or aggressive reactions when you ask people something, even though your questions are perfectly legitimate? I’m also interested in knowing your immediate Feelings when you get a negative reaction.
Hugs
xxxxxx”
And here is Karen’s reply:
“Hi xxxxxx
It all begins with our own thought.
If you are thinking negatively, you will perceive some one’s question/response to be negative. It is all about perception.
Even when I get very heated response from someone else (eg someone shouting at me), I will not response back negatively. This is the sure way to make the person cool down and may even get an apology for the behavior later. And I will accept his/her apology gracefully. That is my perception of life. Why get angry with someone and become sad/hurt yourself? Make no sense to me.
Well, I probably wouldn’t behave in such a COOL manner a few years back. I could do it now because my perception of life and people has changed. Whatever others may perceive, if it is positive, I like to enjoy their positivity. If their response is negative, I will ignore them and do not join in or participate in the negativity.
Cheers
Karen”
Most people feel distressed or helpless or victimized when they are abused verbally or faced with an aggressive person for no reason at all. They tend to think that they have attracted it to themselves. “What have I done to deserve this treatment? ” or “Why me again?” is always the first thing on their mind. So did they really attracted it in the first place?
Not necessary, you could have just caught the person in a foul mood exactly at the wrong moment. A classic case of being at the wrong place at the wrong time.
And what if you had attracted it! You always think “Will boss be mad at me today?” everyday, surely you WILL end up doing something to attract him at his worst moment!
But that beside the point. My point today is how you can handle it when you find yourself in that position whether intentionally or unintentionally. In all these cases, the best defense is stay calm and don’t overreact to the verbal abuse or aggressiveness. Any thing you say will likely be akin to adding fuel to fire and trigger more aggressive or abusive response.
Your lack of response may make him madder at first but trust me when I say he will get over it when he realized that he is acting like a clown or monkey in front of an unappreciative audience. And just like in Karen’s case, when the abuser realized that he was venting his anger on the wrong person, you may just get that sweet apology. 
Your turn to talk: What do you think of this share an answer post? Does it benefit you? Is it OK for you as a reader? Do you have a question you are dying to ask us or get our opinion? You can comment here or sent your questions to karenlim88@gmail.com with the subject (Share An Answer) .
Love,
James
PS: If you do not wish your questions and answers to be publish at all, please do state so. It is our policy that we do not publish names under any circumstances unless explicitly instructed to do so.
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