Visualized.Feel.Abundance

The greatest weapon against stress
is our ability to choose one thought over another.
-William James

Understand this - if you don’t change the way you work or improve your skills in stress management, it does not matter how many jobs you change, you will end up in same cycle again. In a way, you are attracting the stresses you are experiencing at work with the way your handle your assignments, colleagues and bosses.

Let us take a look at what are the sources of stress at work:

Assignments
Assignments are whatever task that is assigned to you by your boss and sometimes by higher management (anyone above your boss). You need to get this concept right. Only jobs assigned by your boss - yes, the fellow that does your appraisal - and by higher management counts as your assignment (since they matter to your boss) and NOT those from colleagues, other department, clients, suppliers, etc.

Assignments are stressful, even when we define it in such a narrow scope because they can be unending. You finished one and get another two! You finish two and get another four! So accept it. In a way, you may have attracted it by being too efficient. Be proud of it, don’t get stressed over it. But you need to do something to manage it. We will talk about it later.

Noises
Noises are any task that are not assignments! But they look just like assignments to your and the fellow who assigns them usually make a hell of a lot of noise if you don’t comply!

Commonly:
- Your colleagues asking a favor
- A colleague from another department demanding that you finished their task first even when the dateline is 2 months away
- You client demanding for a certain report/listing that you never heard of
- Your company’s dance society asking you to join them for practice for a upcoming dinner and dance

Well, you get the drift! In general, anything not stated as part of your Key Performance Indicator (KPI) as defined to you by your boss are noises. They can stress the hell out of you because you tend to do them first because they make noise consistently around you and won’t stop until you are done with them. But IF you comply, you end up having no time to do what you really needed to do. Now you are doubly stressed. And since they got you to do it once, you can be sure they will be back for more. See, you attracted it.

Need It Yesterday
Another huge factor of stress at work place is the date lines given for the task assigned. I call it the “Need It Yesterday” Syndrome. It typically goes like this, “James, I need this piece of assignment done, NOW! Actually I need it yesterday but now it is really urgent so get it on my desk in an hours time.” Sounds familiar? I bet you do.

Feeling Responsible
This last one is the difference between being stressed and not knowing what stress is. Responsible people feel more stress than people who don’t take responsibility. So what am I preaching now? Don’t be responsible? Hardly. You just need to know what you are responsible for and the answer is, Not Everything!

So I have listed 4 things that contributes to stress at work. So how do we manage them and make working an enjoyable experience? Well, maybe not totally enjoyable but definitely less stressful.

Knowing What Is Important To Your Boss
Most people know that working smart is better then working hard but how do you work smart? To me work smart is working on things that counts towards your goal. Your goal at work is, of course, getting a good appraisal that will result in a good pay increment and a promotion! So what you need to focus on are assignments that counts, such as those we defined earlier on.

Focus on assignments that counts towards your KPI. If an assignment is not listed as part of your KPI but your boss insist that it is important, get him to include it into your KPI so they count! If you have to do the work anyway, make them count! Oh, if you boss never set any KPI for you, you are in deeper trouble then you will ever know. Since you have nothing to measure your performance against, you WILL NEVER get a fair appraisal.

But the most important factor here is to know what IS really important to your boss! Find out which assignment matters most to your boss and put your heart and soul to it. You must have heard of those cases where a boss promotes and all his underlings promote together with him, right? That’s what you are aiming to do here. The trick is to ASK him what is important, never assume or second guess!

Eliminate Noise
As defined earlier, any assignments from people who could not possibly appraise you or affect your appraisal in any way are noises. Entertained where necessary and more importantly when you are free to do so.

Noises from supplier and clients are a little trickier. It is a common practice for clients to sometimes ask for anything under the sky, especially at the clerk-to-clerk or executive-to-executive level. Some are routine request that are completely within the contractual obligation for you to provide (your boss would have told you so), but very often they are not! The best way is to ask your boss if you should comply with an incoming request from clients or supplier. Let him decide so that you only do what is necessary and your boss gets to be responsible for all the “NO’s” to the clients and suppliers.

Get Your Responsibility Right
Remember your goal at work is to get a good a good appraisal that will result in a good pay increment and a promotion! So your responsibility is to yourself and to your boss. When you get your responsibility right, you would not feel responsible to noises or feel obliged to respond to them.

Managing Boss’s Expectations
Last but not least, what if your boss is the one that is stressing you out with too much assignments? You manage him, of course! The simplest way is to inform him of your current work load to make him aware of what you have on hand and the estimate time of completion. If you need more time then was scheduled, tell him so and explain the reasons.

When he assigns new task to you, ask him of the importance of the task. If it is real important, ask him which other current task would he like to knock off the schedule? If you let him do the talking and he will convince himself of the new schedule. You won’t even have to provide a reason for shifting any dateline, if he is reasonable.

Oh, for unreasonable bosses that never rewards their staffs, do yourself a favor and change them. They are not worth your effort and you will never meet your goal at work. This is just being responsible to yourself!

So there you have it. 4 factors of stress and 4 simple ways to manage them. It’s your turn to talk

Cheers,
James

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Hey Folks,

It’s been slightly more then 2 months since I wrote my first post on the “9 Secret Steps To Life Transformation” series. It started with the simple vision that I wanted to pen down my success formula that I had put together through years of trial and error at my own cost. I wanted to share it with you and others like you who are interested to help yourself, which is probably why you are sitting here reading this blog.

I believed that abundance starts with giving and sharing. By sharing this gift, I believed that I will attract more into my life. More experience to gain, more positive people to meet, more things to learn and a more fulfilling life.

It is also my hope that my 9 steps has helped at least some of you in some ways. If it did, thank you. I thank you because, you made my sharing valuable and meaningful. If it had help no one or motivated none, it would have been futile. So, Thank You from the bottom of my heart.

If you have benefited from this series, I welcome you to leave a note or comment here. If you have any suggestion for me to improve, you may leave it here too

Before I sign off this post, here is a summary of all the post in the series for your easy reference:

Step 1 - Take Back Your Full Responsibility
Take Back Your Full Responsibility
Story 1 (Part 1)
Story 1 (Part 2)

Step 2 - Show Your Gratitude
Show Gratitude To What You Have
Karen’s Story On Gratitude
A Technique To Give Gratitude

Step 3 - Find Your Dreams
Find Your Dreams
The Ladder Of Dreams

Step 4 - Visualize Your Dreams
Visualize Your Dreams
8 Steps Visualization Technique

Step 5 - Feel Your Dreams
How To Keep Your Dreams Alive (Part 1)
How To Keep Your Dreams Alive (Part 2)
How To Keep Your Dreams Alive (Part 3)
How To Keep Your Dreams Alive (Part 4)

Step 6 - Take Action
The Unspoken Secret Of “The Secret” Movie
Take Action
Do You Procrastinate
Bury The Procrastination Monster

Step 7 - Feel The Abundance
Do You Have Limiting Beliefs
Knowledge Creates Abundance
Karen Lim’s Abundance At Work

Step 8 - Stay On Course
Stay On Course
Learning From Steve Jobs

Step 9 - Study Your Reflection
Study Your Reflections
Study A Successful Refection
How To Choose The Right Mentor

Love,
James

PS: I came across this site telling this touching story about making a difference and it describe how I feel when I know I had made a difference. Enjoy - http://www.makeadifferencemovie.com/  (We are not related to the site but I love the story)

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Hey Folks,

Welcome back! Today I will be sharing a speech given by Steve Jobs during the Commencement address at Stanford University in 2005. Click here for a transcript of the speech if you would rather read than watch.

Did you like it? I do and I learn 3 states of mindset that I have been using to counter the “noises” I mentioned in my last post. This is how I relate them:

The first story is about connecting the dots and I would like to bring your attention to this para:

“…you can’t connect the dots looking forward, you can only connect them (the dots) looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in the future. You have to trust in something, your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. Because believing that the dots will connect down the road, will give you the confidence to follow your heart even if it leads you off the well worn path …”

Our journey in life is like playing the game “connecting the dot”. The difference between this and our childhood game is that there is no numbering of the dots! The dots are like you choices in life, which do you choose? When you lack the knowledge or skill to navigate the jumble of dots, which do you choose? I choose to do what Steve Jobs did in the beginning. I trust my feeling when I choose the next dot and I work towards acquiring the skills and knowledge necessary to make it happen. I trust that by doing all that I care to do, for what I want, that all the dots will be connected at the end.

In recent years, I developed the “Ladder of Dreams” which essentially “maps out the dots, looking backwards”. It puts the numbers back into the “connecting the dot” game. I have been using this technique with wonderful results and great success. If you have not read about it, you can do so here. Oh by the way, don’t throw Steve Jobs advice out of the window just yet. You still need to trust something to choose your “end dot” also know as “Your Dream” even if you choose to use the “Ladder of Dreams”.

I use this first mindset together with “Ladder of Dreams” to get rid of Road Blocks!

The second story is about love and loss and I would like to bring your attention to this para:

“Sometimes life gonna hit you in the head with a brick. Don’t lose faith. I am convince that the only thing that kept me going was that I love what I did … You’ve got to find what you love! That is as truth for work as it is for lovers. Your work is going to fill in a large part of your life and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do!”

It does not matter how well you plan your life and work your plan. It does not matter if you have the most positive mindset and attitude. It does not matter if you have not the slightest negative thought and you have always manifest and visualize only positive thing. Sometimes life will hit you in the head with a brick! Don’t Lose Faith!

Do not doubt if the Law of Attraction has malfunctioned. Do not doubt if you have somehow failed yourself. Do not doubt if someone is out to get you. Leave those aside, they ARE negative thoughts which will definitely attract negative events if they take hold. Instead view the event as natures way of shaping you up for bigger and better things in life. Pick yourself up and move forward.

I love the last part of this particular quote “And the only way to do great work is to love what you do!”. It matters that you love the things you do. It matters that you have passion in your belief. You love and passion will cushion any bricks flying your way and you will not give up without a fight! It does not matter if the negative thoughts comes as sudden as an avalanche or as consistent as a waterfall, you will be able to shrug it off like a prizefighter.

I use this second mindset to fight Negative Feedbacks!

The third story is about death and I would like to bring your attention to this para:

“If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today. And whenever the answer is been NO for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something. Remembering that I’ll be dead soon is the most important tool I’ve ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything, all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure. This things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly what is important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked, there is no reason not to follow your heart.”

Like I say in my last post, I have a weakness for distractions and I am still fighting it today. There are simply too many fun and attractive things to do. I would be perfectly happy doing them if not for the fact that they not only don’t help me achieve my dreams in life but they delay my dream indefinitely.

There was once were I would succumb to distractions every day and delay working my dream. Thankfully, those days are much much lesser now and the single most powerful thought is being describe by Steve Jobs in the quote “If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?”. Ask yourself this question and answer it truthfully. Serious! You will be surprise to find yourself working your dream harder than you have ever been and working it on the longest stretch you could ever remember.

Nowadays, I hardly complete a game that I love or finish watching a TV serial. Sometimes I never even complete a movie! But I do finish my task I set out to do in order to move my goal forward. Even when I declare a day off, I still couldn’t keep myself from checking my progress on my goal.

I use this last mindset to dispel Distractions!

It’s a long post …. and I had originally intended for it to be a 3 part posting. It’s not everyday that I write a long post like this. But after re-writing it a couple of times, I decided to publish it in it’s entirety so that you can get the full picture of what I wanted to share with you.

Love,
James

PS: Do leave a comment if you like the post or think that it should be shorter. I love to hear your comments and sometimes when there is no comments. I thought I had gotten something wrong at my end. Ouch, negative thought!

PPS: I visited many blogs and I saw a lot of them saying “if you like us, you can help us by donating to support us“. Over here, we believed that if you like us, help us by getting a product here that can help you instead. Oh and do us a favor, clear your browser cache before you click on any product links.

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